When I must endure
Happy is everyone who fears the Lord,
Who walks in his ways. Psalm 128:1
Read James 1:2—8
I have not asked for everything I have had to endure in my life. Plenty that I have had to face I could quite happily be freed from. That is, as my life presents itself to me, there are any number of temptations to escape, relationships to leave unresolved, and confrontations to avoid. I have at times a high passion for irresponsibility. But I also have a voice somewhere. Is it in an inner ear? ‘Do you know who it is you are avoiding, really? Do you know who is going to reveal more of himself as we go through this together? Do you suppose you will learn more of yourself if we do not? You don’t want to miss that, you know: being deepened in what my grace is about, where I am really to be proved. You’ll be a shadow of who you would become if you run from every confrontation. There’s a glory waiting in the suffering of endurance. You know that. If you don’t, then there is an opportunity now to begin.’
You are gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.[1] And you would have me know this about you by familiarity with your character. You would have me taste your nature and see that you are good. So you are at my side, ready for me to learn of you. And you are actually in the unasked-for. I see that the very things I would avoid come to me as the place for meeting with God, that your grace awaits me in them. This night strengthen me in faithfulness.
[1] Jonah 4:3